Depression, Anxiety

[Full Noise]

Originally Posted by T3rminator

Hi guys/gals. I have been lurking this thread from time to time but not contributed, but I think nows the time. Snip.

G’day Mate,
I will say that I typed out a long reply to your post but deleted it. I’m a little surprised with the things you’ve said and am aware that if I can’t say anything constructive, it’s best not to say anything at all.

I will say a few things though.

Put the blinkers on, look straight ahead, not sideways and change your attitude.
Stop trying to look for racism, its not there in this country. Stop listening to clowns like the race discrimination commissioner and the knobs on The Project. If all you look for is racism, that’s all you’ll see.

YOU are fortunate enough to live in one of the most peaceful countries on earth.

So two blokes muttered something under their breath as you walked past and you were ready to start a blue over it... Really? That’s not anxiety mate, that’s an anger management issue. Tell me something. If those two blokes were 6’11, four foot across the shoulders and covered in tattoos, would you still want to start a blue with them or would you just walk away?
Forget about being a tough guy, that only works in the movies. Play the tough guy and there’s one place that you’ll end up and if you think that it’s hard on the outside, wait till you see what happens inside.

I have a few suggestions, it’s up to you whether you act on them.

1. Don’t worry about your parents, they are safe here. Just comfort them and be sure not to alarm them with what’s going on at the moment. Don’t allow them to watch the mainstream news if you’re able.
2. Talk to someone who deals with anger management. I did a course a few years back even though I didn’t need to do it, it was ordered by the court and was still beneficial.
3. Don’t listen to left-wing mainstream media with their fake news. Leave the race card and the victim card behind and concentrate on being strong.
4. Seek out another Hypnotherapist. If it worked for you in the past, go with what worked.
5. Get up in the morning and go to work. It will do wonders for your mental health.

Sorry to sound harsh.

[T3rminator]

Thanks. I was actually just whatsapping with a friend last night and it occurred to me it might be an anger issue. The problem is that I play various scenarios over and over again in my mind. Small things have happened in the past, I ignore it because they were small, but when I get home, I stew on it for days. And thats when the anxiety builds. There was a period of about 3 weeks during the start of the pandemic where I spent all day thinking "what ifs". What if someone says something directly at me out in public? What if someone vandalises my house? What if someone vandalises my car? What if someone abuses my family? What if someone does something to my dog? etc etc. I know it sounds stupid to play "what ifs". I can be having a great day and these thoughts will just pop in from no where. I can't explain it. I would then go sleep it off, this can be 10am, 1pm, 3pm, and people get suspicious. I don't tell my folks because I don't think they could handle it, and its not in our culture to talk about these sorts of things.



I don't watch the project or those type of shows. Before the incident yesterday, there had been no real incident to justify those thoughts, but I still have them, if you get what I mean.

[MercuryT]

To the posts above I really appreciate the support.

I also promise to get to the PMs asap.

Unfortunately I ended up in a bit of a state last night as very upset with what was said to me. I'm a bit fragile at the moment.

But I'm ok guys so don't worry about me at all, I'll get there.

Thanks again all.

Chris

[FoxtrotGolfXray 5.0]

Originally Posted by MercuryT

To the posts above I really appreciate the support.

I also promise to get to the PMs asap.

Unfortunately I ended up in a bit of a state last night as very upset with what was said to me. I'm a bit fragile at the moment.

But I'm ok guys so don't worry about me at all, I'll get there.

Thanks again all.

Chris

Hey Chris,

Great to hear from you, mate! In fact, I'm relieved to hear from you, as I'm sure others will be.

I appreciate that things are tough for you st the moment, understandably. Hopefully the outreach following your post last night shows that there are people that care about your welfare.

Do whatever you feel you need to do to get some help, mate.

I sincerely wish you all the best.

Craig

[MercuryT]

Thank you Craig. (just seen Shav's msg also....thanks matw)

The support I'm very grateful for and I'm genuinely appreciative to know people care even if don't know me. Very humbling.

I took the day off work to try and reset and I think it's best I don't engage with negativity at home at the moment.....learn to walk away as Full Noise said and ignore it.

So yeah I'll move forward and I'm certainly willing to try and help others if or where I can.

Chris

[blueoval]

Glad to see you posting again Chris. Just know that even though many of us here do not know you at all. We all support you and are prepared to help you get through this as much as we can. I know you have most of our support here.

[FTE217]

All good now as mentioned by the good fellas that posted since and glad your a ok, well back despite whats going on in your head but please don't end posts like that again MT, it ain't healthy for all of us as well if you know what I mean in a kind way.

Yes you need to walk away, take a deep breath and keep walking for a mo.
Just get away from what is mucking the head up.

I'll let it out here now, I'm going through some challenging issues as well of late, if I don't walk away from the negative comments etc it just gets worse, walk and do something else, thats my only quick fix atm.
It helps.

[MercuryT]

Originally Posted by FTE217

All good now as mentioned by the good fellas that posted since and glad your a ok, well back despite whats going on in your head but please don't end posts like that again MT, it ain't healthy for all of us as well if you know what I mean in a kind way.

Yes I know and I apologise. Was stupid and unintentionally selfish.

I'll be sure to try and not do it again I wasn't thinking straight but the drive and time away today has helped a lot.

Definitely think your advice is right and I'll try and do that in future before it gets to that point.

I hope you are ok then also so by all means PM me anytime.

[FoxtrotGolfXray 5.0]

Originally Posted by MercuryT

Yes I know and I apologise. Was stupid and unintentionally selfish.

I'll be sure to try and not do it again I wasn't thinking straight but the drive and time away today has helped a lot.

Definitely think your advice is right and I'll try and do that in future before it gets to that point.

I hope you are ok then also so by all means PM me anytime.

I don't think you have anything to apologise for MT.

If I may be so rude as to try and interpret what FTE said, I think we all understand that there are times when we feel down and feel that we have no option but put ourselves out of our misery.

Being open about that is a good thing, IMO. I'd rather you (or anyone else feeling the same way) come on here and told us honestly how you are feeling, as that gives us the opportunity to be able to help you, in whatever way it takes so that you don't take that action.

What we all hope for is that no one ever feels that way in the first place. I know that is not reality, but that would be my goal (a bit like having a goal in an organisation to not cause anyone any harm, from an OHS&E perspective).

Please, please, please, I implore you, do not feel that you should not be expressing how you are feeling on here when you feel you have no other choice than to end your life. I would much rather see you (or anyone else for that matter) be open and honest about how you are feeling than bottle it up and pretend everything is ok, and then learn later that we may have had an opportunity to help.

You, or anyone else, should not be ashamed of the way you feel. Being truly open and honest about how you feel is the only way that things can get resolved. There is little to be gained by sweeping things under the carpet.

It seems to me like you are truly a decent person with a positive outlook. Yes, I know times are tough now, but if you can see your way through your current position, things will get better. As best you can, put positive people around you that love you for who you are, warts and all. Those are the people you want and need on your side.

All the best, my friend.

[FTE217]

Originally Posted by FoxtrotGolfXray 5.0

I don't think you have anything to apologise for MT.

If I may be so rude as to try and interpret what FTE said, I think we all understand that there are times when we feel down and feel that we have no option but put ourselves out of our misery.

Being open about that is a good thing, IMO. I'd rather you (or anyone else feeling the same way) come on here and told us honestly how you are feeling, as that gives us the opportunity to be able to help you, in whatever way it takes so that you don't take that action.

What we all hope for is that no one ever feels that way in the first place. I know that is not reality, but that would be my goal (a bit like having a goal in an organisation to not cause anyone any harm, from an OHS&E perspective).

Please, please, please, I implore you, do not feel that you should not be expressing how you are feeling on here when you feel you have no other choice than to end your life. I would much rather see you (or anyone else for that matter) be open and honest about how you are feeling than bottle it up and pretend everything is ok, and then learn later that we may have had an opportunity to help.

You, or anyone else, should not be ashamed of the way you feel. Being truly open and honest about how you feel is the only way that things can get resolved. There is little to be gained by sweeping things under the carpet.

It seems to me like you are truly a decent person with a positive outlook. Yes, I know times are tough now, but if you can see your way through your current position, things will get better. As best you can, put positive people around you that love you for who you are, warts and all. Those are the people you want and need on your side.

All the best, my friend.

Not taking being rude at all by your input, well done !!!!!!

MT, no apoligy needed as well nor think of it being selfish, we're all guilty of saying or posting things without thinking at times.

All the best whitelion.

[blueoval]

Im so glad this thread has been made. Even just to vent. I feel getting things off your chest so to speak is a therapeutic way to relieve some of the pent up frustration of life you normally would bottle up.

Kudos to everyone here who has said something and also supported others on their difficult journey's.

I think its a great thing to be able to have a listening ear, or to vent to a point that if it avoids something more catastrophic, even for just 1 person, it's been successful.

[whitelion65]

Good to hear from you MT.
I'm going through some s#!t at the moment (small minds with too much power at work).
Went for a run this afternoon. Unfortunately, atm my fitness level doesn't equal my frustration level.
unfortunately, tomorrow I have to go in and eat a bowl of manure....but I know I am in the right, so will stay the course.
Phsyc tomorrow afternoon....it may be messy...

Hang in there brothers...reach out to someone....anyone....if you need to.

Steve

[MercuryT]

Packaged up all my clothes today - they're going to Salvos.

Most are hardly worn, lots of good quality but others need more than me.

Now deleted that the room is now back and I don't feel as stressed. Mess everywhere gets to me.

Steve - thank you I will.

Thank you again to all. Mum and I had an open chat and I feel better for it.

[MercuryT]

WhiteLion - let us know how you go after Psych.

I personally would hope a step forward

[sneaky]

Triple M are doing a full day of radio today with no ads, no mic breaks, no news, etc.. the aim is to 'give guys a chance to talk' about their mental health. I'm not sure if this is nation wide or Newcastle only.

I don't know if anyone else is from Newcastle area but I noticed last Friday the normal morning presenters (Tanya and Steve) weren't on air on Triple M. On Monday they had a great chat on air about the circumstances around it.

Steve explained he has some mental health issues and triggers (didn't go into his trigger on air). Something hit his trigger early in the week and he spiraled until Friday morning, no sleep, I'm assuming heavy drinking (they often reference his drinking on air), feelings of being a burden (sounds familiar to me), 'no one' to talk to (he has separated from his wife in recent years).

He had showed up at the studio Friday morning and couldn't go on air, told his crew he couldn't do it and walked out. This was the lowest his colleagues had ever seen him. Tanya (the other presenter he has known for 20yrs plus) followed him home and waited outside his house, checked on him through the day until he had slept and was in a state to talk to her.

This is a guy at the top of his career with many years of number 1 rated breakfast radio show, some level of fame and fortune, close and caring friends and family and he still suffers and has 'bad' days.

I was very impressed with them for actually airing the story and having an open and honest discussion on air, not just glossing over the absence.

maybe the stigma of mental health will slowly be eroded and having a 'sick day' or two for mental breaks won't be so difficult in the future.

[Citroënbender]

Good on the fellow’s colleague, per your report.

[FoxtrotGolfXray 5.0]

Originally Posted by sneaky

Triple M are doing a full day of radio today with no ads, no mic breaks, no news, etc.. the aim is to 'give guys a chance to talk' about their mental health. I'm not sure if this is nation wide or Newcastle only.

I don't know if anyone else is from Newcastle area but I noticed last Friday the normal morning presenters (Tanya and Steve) weren't on air on Triple M. On Monday they had a great chat on air about the circumstances around it.

Steve explained he has some mental health issues and triggers (didn't go into his trigger on air). Something hit his trigger early in the week and he spiraled until Friday morning, no sleep, I'm assuming heavy drinking (they often reference his drinking on air), feelings of being a burden (sounds familiar to me), 'no one' to talk to (he has separated from his wife in recent years).

He had showed up at the studio Friday morning and couldn't go on air, told his crew he couldn't do it and walked out. This was the lowest his colleagues had ever seen him. Tanya (the other presenter he has known for 20yrs plus) followed him home and waited outside his house, checked on him through the day until he had slept and was in a state to talk to her.

This is a guy at the top of his career with many years of number 1 rated breakfast radio show, some level of fame and fortune, close and caring friends and family and he still suffers and has 'bad' days.

I was very impressed with them for actually airing the story and having an open and honest discussion on air, not just glossing over the absence.

maybe the stigma of mental health will slowly be eroded and having a 'sick day' or two for mental breaks won't be so difficult in the future.

Hey Tim, that's a great story. Thanks for sharing.

In my experience, people coming out and talking about mental health issues is becoming more commonplace. And I respect them for that and think its great, as it starts to normalise mental health as an issue. That's not to say that we shouldn't treat mental health because 'it's normal' more so that people can see that all sorts of people, from all sorts of walks of life and personal circumstances suffer mental health issues.

In recent years I've come to consider mental health issues as akin to physical issues. It's not normal that everyone has a broken arm. But when they do break it, we know the best way to treat it, and how to offer support for them to rehabilitate from it. Mental health is no different, IMHO. Albeit that (perhaps) mental health is a little more difficult to treat, because the forms of it are so varied.

I still find it strange the way mental health in the workplace is treated too. I see this very frequently. If someone has a mental health issue and they need time off from work as a result, then the details of their circumstances is kept from their colleagues for fear of releasing personal information. Yet, if that same person were to suffer a physical injury, then the details of their injury are normally reported widely, and the person receives all sort of support from their work colleagues to help them through it. By not sharing the circumstances of someone suffering mental heath issues, we marginalise them even further.

Each day I send out a quote of the day to my designated work group (I am a health and safety rep). Today, I came across a quote from Jim Carrey, the comedian we all know from movies such as The Mask or Ace Ventura.

Now, I'm not a fan of his acting, as he is too over the top for me. But, the quote today got me interested and I found some more quotes from him that were truly inspiring. I'll share some here as I think they may just help out some people here too:

Background:
Jim Carrey is now known as one of the best comedians to appear on the big screen, but he didn’t always have it easy. When he was young, his father lost his job and as a result, the whole family had to live in a minivan parked on a relative’s lawn. But despite all this, Carrey remained a true believer in the law of attraction.

If you ask Jim Carrey, he will insist that his life is proof that the universe does listen to our wishes. While still living in Canada and with almost no money in his bank account, Jim Carrey would visualize actors and directors telling him how they liked his work.

At the age of 28, when he was still struggling as a young comedian, he wrote himself a check for 10 million dollars and gave himself 5 years to cash it in. In the memo, he wrote: “For acting services rendered.” He kept it in his wallet it until July 1995, a few weeks before his self-imposed deadline when he found out he would be making 10 million dollars for his role in Dumb and Dumber.

But he tells this story by also reminding us that you still have to work hard to get there. In his own words and in a very Jim Carrey way he says: “ You can’t just visualize it and then go eat a sandwich.”

"Life opens up opportunities to you, and you either take them or you stay afraid of taking them"

“As far as I can tell, it’s just about letting the universe know what you want and then working toward it while letting go of how it comes to pass.”

“It is better to risk starving to death than surrender. If you give up on your dreams, what’s left?”

“My focus is to forget the pain of life. Forget the pain, mock the pain, reduce it. And laugh.”

“If you aren’t in the moment, you are either looking forward to uncertainty, or back to pain and regret.”

“I wake up some mornings and sit and have my coffee and look out at my beautiful garden, and I go, ’Remember how good this is. Because you can lose it.”

“I learned many great lessons from my father, not the least of which, was that you can fail at what you don’t want so you might as well take a chance on doing what you love”

There is a huge difference between a dog that is going to eat you in your mind and an actual dog that’s going to eat you.”

“I’m making a conscious choice to see challenges as beneficial so that I can deal with them in the most productive way”

[blueoval]

The day started off well, but as the day went on I could feel an overwhelming sense of darkness fill my head. My attitude changed and practically anything and everyone around me was ticking me off. It didnt matter what I did, I just wanted to cry. I feel like Im trapped.

[MercuryT]

Originally Posted by blueoval

The day started off well, but as the day went on I could feel an overwhelming sense of darkness fill my head. My attitude changed and practically anything and everyone around me was ticking me off. It didnt matter what I did, I just wanted to cry. I feel like Im trapped.

PM me if you want mate. Otherwise I'll leave you alone, no pressure.

You aren't trapped it's just an emotion. Stay positive.

[CoupeKing]

Originally Posted by blueoval

The day started off well, but as the day went on I could feel an overwhelming sense of darkness fill my head. My attitude changed and practically anything and everyone around me was ticking me off. It didnt matter what I did, I just wanted to cry. I feel like Im trapped.

Try and think of them good times.

[MercuryT]

How is everyone going outside Shav?

I've been up and down but keen for work Monday.

Especially Vic people, stressful

[blueoval]

PM sent

[sneaky]

This week has been ok - maybe it was the bike ride with my son, or going to work and seeing people for a change, or maybe the zoloft is kicking in.

I'm on leave next week for the school holidays with the kids. We don't have any exciting plans at this stage, toying with the idea of hitting the go karts for a bit of a play.

[whitelion65]

Feeling pretty much the same, Blueoval.
I’m getting by on hopes and prayers.
On a background of depression, I’m having to deal with a vindictive campaign by A-holes.
One more day....one more day....

[blueoval]

One thing I keep reminding myself is "One day at a time". Im trying not to think of what is going to happen tomorrow.

I appreciate all who have reached out to me. You guys are truly gems and I am feeling a little better today. Just going to concentrate on what I can do today.

[FoxtrotGolfXray 5.0]

Originally Posted by blueoval

One thing I keep reminding myself is "One day at a time". Im trying not to think of what is going to happen tomorrow.

I appreciate all who have reached out to me. You guys are truly gems and I am feeling a little better today. Just going to concentrate on what I can do today.

This quote from Jim Carrey came to mind, Shav:

“If you aren’t in the moment, you are either looking forward to uncertainty, or back to pain and regret.”

It's a great way to be able to get back into a reasonable headspace such that you can then start to look forward to certainty.

[blueoval]

Originally Posted by FoxtrotGolfXray 5.0

This quote from Jim Carrey came to mind, Shav:

“If you aren’t in the moment, you are either looking forward to uncertainty, or back to pain and regret.”

It's a great way to be able to get back into a reasonable headspace such that you can then start to look forward to certainty.

Thanks mate, Ive never heard of that but it's true. I have to stop thinking about things I cannot control and start thinking about the things I can even if they are smaller things.

[FoxtrotGolfXray 5.0]

I also recall in one of the mental first aid courses I did, that they were saying that depression is (partly) about focusing (too much) on the past, and that anxiety is about focusing (too much) on the future.

If you are experiencing any of these, then focusing on the now will help reduce the depression/anxiety.

That's also the basis of mindfulness: being in the now and appreciating the now for what it is. Youtube mindfulness and I'm sure you'll find heaps of resources that can help you out.

Even simple things like finding a nice spot in the sun to sit and enjoy the moment can help pick up you spirits.

[blueoval]

Originally Posted by FoxtrotGolfXray 5.0

I also recall in one of the mental first aid courses I did, that they were saying that depression is (partly) about focusing (too much) on the past, and that anxiety is about focusing (too much) on the future.

If you are experiencing any of these, then focusing on the now will help reduce the depression/anxiety.

That's also the basis of mindfulness: being in the now and appreciating the now for what it is. Youtube mindfulness and I'm sure you'll find heaps of resources that can help you out.

Even simple things like finding a nice spot in the sun to sit and enjoy the moment can help pick up you spirits.

Thanks for those tips. It looks like I suffer from both Anxiety and Depression. But I will be focusing more on the now to try and control things. See how that goes.

[blueoval]

Hey T3rminator,

Just to fill you in on a little of my back ground, I am Thai born, adopted at 3 months old and lived in Australia ever since. I am definitely not unfamiliar with racism growing up. I have been called all sorts and yeah it affected me too. Coming from another asian born person and living in Australia, I know how you feel.

I too have these anger issues and I sometimes playout revenge scenarios in my head but I find all that does for me is generate unnecessary adrenaline so I have to teach myself to be more peaceful. It's not an easy thing to learn and the first step is always to accept that you have the issue and you WILL do something about it. Be it hypnotherapy, yoga, religion, sport or something as long as its non self sabotaging. i.e. alcohol, drugs etc.

I also recommend having someone close to you that you can openly talk to face to face or at least over the phone. I find they can give a cold hard dose of reality and often getting something off your chest is a way of therapy too. But as Full Noise said, go with what has worked for you in the past. Yes your regular hypnotherapy has moved on, but you can find another one. Its about the techniques they use rather than the individual themselves at the end of the day.

If you ever need to talk though man, feel free and PM me. Happy to chat.

Shav