What jokes do you know?

[Burnout]

WHEN GIRLS DRINK TOO MUCH

1. We have absolutely no idea where our purse is

2. We believe that dancing with our arms overhead and wiggling our butt
while yelling "woo-hoo!" is truly the sexiest dance move around

3. We've suddenly decided that we want to kick someone's *** and honestly
believe we could do it too

4. In our last trip to pee, we realize that we now look more like a homeless
hooker than the goddess we were just four hours ago

5. We drop our 3:00 a.m. burger on the floor (which we're eating even though
we are not the least bit hungry), pick it up and carry on eating it

6. We start crying and telling everyone we see that we love them sooooo much

7. We get extremely excited and jump up and down every time a new song plays because "oh my god! I love this song!"

8. We've found a deeper/spiritual side to the geek sitting next to us

9. The man we're flirting with used to be our 5th grade teacher

10. The urge to take off articles of clothing, stand on a table and sing or
dance becomes strangely overwhelming to us

11. Our eyes just don't seem to want to stay open on their own so we keep
them half closed and think it looks exotically sexy

12. We've suddenly taken up smoking and become really good at it

13. We yell at the bartender, who we believe cheated us by giving us just
coke, but that's just because we can no longer taste the vodka

14. We think we are in bed, but our pillow feels strangely like the kitchen
floor

15. We start every conversation with a booming, "don't take this the wrong
way but..."

16. We fail to notice that the toilet lid's down when we sit on it

17. Our hugs begin to resemble wrestling take-down moves

18. We are tired so we just sit on the floor (wherever we happen to be
standing) and take a quick nap

19. We begin leaving the buttons open on our button fly pants to cut down
on the time we're in the bathroom away from our drink

20. We take our shoes off because we believe it's their fault that we're
having problems walking straight